Monday, 13 April 2015

Feeling Flat

As a mother who deals with my own anxiety, stress, emotional baggage and issues with the world and many people in it, I find that while I love homeschooling and the positives it brings to our lives, I do find myself going through periods of feeling flat and also feeling completely overwhelmed. 

I used to get very down about it and question everything I was doing.

I posted a while ago about it being very much ok to stay at home and not do much in the way of interacting with the community, but I will go one step further and add that it is also ok to have down time, mental holiday breaks and time out.

In fact I think it's essential.

For both you and your child.

Many do this by getting themselves a hobby or having child free time to follow passions or simply catch up with friends or take time out to read a book. It recharges your batteries and makes for a happy mum.

Many like myself struggle to do that though.  A hobby adds many things to my life I don't want or need - which is often more stuff and clutter, more pressure to fit things in, more expectations of ourselves and often financially are not do able. Many of us cannot get child free time as are either single mothers with no support, have special needs children who need them all the time (me) or who simply don't have access to time for themselves.  Many like myself have health problems too, which adds more issues and makes time out harder. I've struggled with the me time aspect. I really have. I know I need it but I have made myself feel so guilty about having days where all I wanted to do was lay in bed and sleep while my son played or watched movies. But it happens. 

So instead I give myself permission to have periods through our homeschool year where I back right off. My son can enjoy childhood and play while I recuperate and rest. I give myself mental health days (sometimes a few in a row!), time out and try not to stress about not sitting at a desk teaching my son. That's my 'me' time. I take off my homeschool hat and be me for a while, just at home, with my son, just unwinding. 

I might even have the time to make myself a cup of tea, with the good china, just because I am worth it. 

I feel that's ok to do, I feel it's essential for me to do and I needed to say it for all the mothers like me who find it hard to cope sometimes. 

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