Last year I used to have time to blog. It was my escape from things here at home and some quiet time to sit and reflect on our days. I was never a daily blogger but I liked to at least check in weekly.
This year however has been very different. And I have felt a tad guilty over my lack of online presence and my lack of blog posts. I am starting to realise though that I can't do everything and that something had to give in my life to allow me some breathing space and sadly that turned out to be my blog time.
It's hard enough being a Mum. Doing everyday Mum stuff.
Then I double the workload with a special needs child and all that that entails (sleepless nights (night after night after night!), on duty 24/7 for everything, hospital appointments, Dr appointments, therapy appointments, funding paperwork, funding bills and accounting, research, referrals, phone calls, chemist visits and the list goes on). Then I add the element of homeschooling and special needs homeschooling at that - so I am teacher and teacher aide all rolled into one. Our work is slow going and my presence is needed all the time, we have very little independent working. This year I also added the role of single parent to my list. Having my own disabilities has meant that being the sole parent is very physically difficult. All the things I struggle to do now need to be done without help and its exhausting.
I am stretched to exhaustion point and finding time to sit and blog just hasn't happened.
I now realise that despite my best intentions, and the fact that blogging is like therapy for me, it's best for me to rest.
So while I am not giving up my blog, I am 'giving it a rest' for a while and not putting so much pressure on myself to come up with something brilliant to say each week.
Looking forward to some me time sometime soon and hopefully I will have something enlightening to post for you all!
Today begins Autism Awareness month. Over the last 5 years I spent every day of April (and many throughout the year) promoting Autism Awareness. I don't regret my daily awareness social media posts. I don't regret that because of them I have helped others become aware, recognise ASD in their own children, recognise the ASD issues in my child and help him, and ACCEPT ASD in all it's forms.
I also do not regret the many people who left my life because of those posts. The ignorant and self absorbed 'friends' who were annoyed by ONE post a day from me showing up on their news feeds. I even cut ties with family over those posts. Sending me a message to say you are 'unfriending' me on facebook because my one post a day clogged your news feed is not only an indicator of your lack of friends, but of your rudeness and general attitude which is probably the reason for your lack of friends in the first place. What I found funny was in each case, I was expected to apologise and to remain in contact with these people after the unfriending. Funny because they had to be joking right?
You may think that posting awareness messages was a negative thing to have lost large number of family and friends from my life over those 5 years. But that's not the case. Good riddance to them all I say. My awareness posts brought about the end of these relationships sooner rather than later and saved me a lot of wasted time and effort so it was a good way of thinning the herd.
The thing about being an ASD parent, is that you find yourself going through stages. There is the struggle before diagnosis, the bitter sweet shock and sadness at diagnosis, the grief and 'why us' stage, the confusion and finding your feet stage, the endless therapy stage, the school issues stage ... the list goes on. Many people get stuck in the early stages and never move on from that, but many of us move through the stages and get to the acceptance stage. The place in our journey where we accept who WE are as parents, accept ASD for what it is, accept our kids for the awesome children they are, and work towards our futures. We don't look for cures, we stop reading the endless stream of articles listing causes. We stop living in the blame game, stop looking for the exit door.
I'm at the Maintenance / Acceptance / Celebration stage. The "we've worked things out" and are managing stage, where the hard work of the past years is paying off. Where we might want to take on new challenges or just enjoy the place we are in. We can see the good things about ASD, we can celebrate them. That's us now.
We've been through diagnosis, we've been through therapies, we've been through school issues, we've survived and found what works for us.
What works for us is homeschooling.
Honestly, it's the biggest and best change we ever made to our lives and the benefits to the ASD issues we were facing will far outweigh any struggles we've had in finding our feet in the homeschooling journey.
Now I will say, that homeschooling is NOT for everyone, it is NOT possible for many financially, physically or mentally. It is not the answer for everyone with ASD. However it was the answer for us. It meant no need for medication, it meant no more depression and suicidal thoughts from my son, it meant improved health, it meant a huge reduction in anxiety, it meant less sensory overload, it meant less aggravation and frustration. Quite simply, it worked for us or I wouldn't still be doing it. We are in our 4th year of homeschooling and don't plan on stopping any time soon. It is by no means "a cure" as ASD is a way of life and a way of thinking NOT a disease, but it is the best option for us.
What improvements happened for us with homeschooling?
Physical changes: no more daily anxiety vomiting which meant no more stomach problems, weight gain (my son had not gained weight since he was 3.5 years old and started Kindy and was almost 7 yrs old when we started homeschooling), colour back in his cheeks, no more black bags under his eyes, sleeping through the night for the first time in his life, he smiled, he laughed, he played. He also grew a lot. Did you know, according to medical research, that anxious children have stunted growth?
Emotional changes: my son was happy again. There was no daily tears, no anger at everything, frustration at everything, refusal of everything. He was no longer in shut down or meltdown mode every day. He would get excited rather than frightened. He was able to self regulate his emotions more and he was able to be calm and content for the first time. He was able to talk through his emotions. He felt he could really BE himself. That he wasn't being judged or singled out for his ASD issues.
Mental Health changes: after being suicidal, coming to us at 6 years old and asking which was the least upsetting way for a parent to find their child after ending their lives, my son's mental health did a huge back flip. He has NEVER gotten to a suicidal state since then (when we removed him from school). Even years of therapy with a psychologist had not been able to help his mental depressive state, but homeschooling did. His severe anxiety was significantly reduced and he was able to function again. No more hiding under chairs and tables, no more social withdrawal. He was chatty, he would approach people to talk and make friends, he was relaxed. One of the other huge positives, is that in your home, there is no class bully. There is no playground bully. You will probably still encounter a bully or two in a homeschool social group, but the difference being that the child has more self confidence than when at school, they have parent back up and support and the problems are dealt with directly and not brushed aside by schools.
Educational changes: my son has a very high IQ but struggled at school with little help and was getting C's and D's in all his subjects despite us being told he was in the highest portion of the class (doesn't THAT say something about our education system and mainstream schooling!). He was at the start of Grade 2 and could not read, spell, do basics. At home he was able to get one on one help with me, no distractions, no noise, no sensory overload, could go at his pace, could do a lot of revision work and concentrate on problem areas, could advance in areas he was good at. I could easily see where the deficits were and was able to pin point learning disorders that the school was unable to notice. We were then able to have those things tested for and diagnosed and put in learning supports and strategies. My son's first year at home we used a Distance Education school and his report card from them was straight A's and he received a Principals Academic Award. So not only were his results more reflective of his intelligence, but he was able to learn in a way more appropriate to his learning difficulties. My son now enjoys learning, he willingly gets a book to read. I can cater his education specifically to his needs.
Sensory changes: I'd like to think that as children with sensory needs get older, that they all develop a tolerance to things that previously resulted in meltdowns or shutdowns. However this is usually a gradual process. For us, the first month at home there were huge improvements. Almost as if a switch was flicked as many issues appeared to change immediately. I think that in a school environment, EVERYTHING sensory is happening all at once and that's where the overload comes in and when the child falls apart. Many hold it together at school then come home and explode in meltdowns. Trust me, that meltdown after school child, is NOT the one you are trying to teach at home. At home, the sensory issues are somewhat separate from each other or in milder forms. There might be some noise, but it will only be one or two people talking or a TV in the background or a single light buzzing. But not 30 people talking in the classroom (with the rest of the school talking just a building away), ten lights per room buzzing, plus the noise of people walking, pencils writing on paper, paper shuffling, sniffling kids, school bell ringing, a sport class happening outside, a music class' noise filtering through the school, chairs being scuffed on the floor, a ceiling fan rattling etc. Being able to reduce the number of sensory issues is much easier at home. You already would have set up your home with their sensory needs in mind so there are lots of safe places at home for them to unwind. They will still have meltdowns but not as often, not as easily triggered and you are not as exhausted as you were in the past so can deal with them better and have a little more patience. My son can now tolerate a lot of sensory input that in the past he would not have been.
Social changes: while ASD children have social difficulties, they are not anti-social when in comfortable situations. Another great thing to remember is that ASD children are often selectively social. In school, children experience forced interaction which is not socialising, it is not a choice and it is not fun. This for an ASD child can be difficult to navigate and cope with. They are told they should have friends but most do not have anything in common with these peers other than sharing the same birth year. Many will withdraw, prefer to be alone, get bullied, and not enjoy 'making' friends. At school my son was bullied, he was alone most lunchtimes, he spent his play time at the library to avoid getting bullied in the playground, he did not have any friends, he was not comfortable being around others. At home, my son is alone. He is an only child. He LOVES being alone in his OWN space. But not having forced interactions every day for 6+ hours means that he is open to being social now. When he goes somewhere he is not hiding from yet another social situation, he enjoys it and is open to making friends. He will have a conversation rather than a monotone response to answers. He will seek out children to play with. He will be present in activities rather than hiding from everything. Homeschooling can be isolating and as a parent you need to be pro-active in sourcing activities etc. There can be bad socialising experiences (and yes we experienced them and had set backs) in homeschooling but in general and in the longer term for us it has been positive and much better in terms of social development than when at school. It also means that we can have a day of being social with friends (yes homeschooling for us has meant making real friends!) and then a day of alone time at home learning to balance things out and not get too overloaded and tired.
So homeschooling for us has not only been the answer to so many ASD issues we faced, but it has been the way for us to move forward, find happiness again and embrace being ourselves, ASD and all.
This year, my drive to get out and educate everyone, to post daily awareness messages to everyone I know, has fallen away somewhat. I am in a different head space. Maybe because I am in the end stages of the process? Like many others in my situation, I feel I've passed the baton onto the next wave of ASD parents I know. They are in the trenches right now and have the fighting spirit to get out there and spread the word. I feel like I've done my time in the trenches, done my tours of duty. This Warrior Mum will always be a warrior, don't get me wrong, but I feel I've stepped slightly off the ASD battle field and as we currently have other medical issues to deal with and I feel my frontline experience is needed in a new battlefield next door. It's part of being a parent I think, conquer one thing and then refocus and deal with the next.
So I am not abandoning the Autism Awareness bandwagon, I am simply stepping aside for fresh louder voices to carry it forward. We live "ASD" every day, we spread awareness every day.
I'd like to finish off this post with something to watch. This children's cartoon is great to watch, great to get your children to watch and so helpful in spreading awareness, understanding and acceptance. If you are going to do anything this April for Autism Awareness month, then let this be it. If it changes or improves the way you view Autism and Aspergers in children, then this blog post was worth it. If your children learn how to be friends with an ASD child then it will make many ASD children and their parents very happy.
While our journey with ASD will never be over, and it will have it's ups and downs, it will have it's 3 steps forward and 2 steps back ..... it's not a fight for us now, it's a truce, a peace treaty. You are always on guard - but you can relax a little. At the end of the day, I hope all ASD families get to this place in their journeys too. Having awareness, understanding and acceptance of this Diffability (Difference in Ability not Disability) is the KEY to moving forward.
Today was our weekly horse riding lesson at Riding for Disabled. Warrior Kid loves it, it's the highlight of his week. This is the start of our 3rd year and he has progressed so much. My son has Aspergers (plus a stack of co-morbid disorders) and also some physical problems. He does well in the small class of 3 and looks forward to seeing the other kids and the volunteers each week. Today - it rained. A LOT! It started halfway along our drive so I decided to keep going in case it stopped when we got to riding. Everyone was in the shed having morning tea and hoping the rain would stop. It was heavy and the middle of a storm. I was thinking we'd stay 10 minutes and to be honest it did not look like the storm was going to end any time soon and the horses would be wet and not up for a ride anyway. But that's when it happened. The child who I have at home all the time, the chatty, bubbly, funny, over excited child appeared. While he likes the other kids, today there was none (they were clever and avoided the rain LOL) and so he let his guard down. There was no other child to compete with for attention, that he had to put on his 'brave face' or mask for, it was just the volunteers. While he always talks to them, it's more a case of him answering questions and needing to be prompted to say hello etc. I think they were all in shock today when he talked their legs off! Luckily for them his topic of choice was his pets as they could follow along in the conversation (if you can call it that as he barely came up for air!). I imagined the looks on their faces had it been Pokemon. Phew. He talked, and talked, and talked - for an hour. Then the rain stopped. Just as it was time for us to leave. As the next session of children had not arrived (because of the weather), Warrior Kid was asked if he wanted a ride. No Saddle, no stirrups, just a soft riding pad (in case the weather turned nasty again).
Well what a difference being the only child in a lesson made! He was relaxed and calm, usually he is quite tense, fairly quiet and a bit standoffish. He was able to communicate with the volunteers so much better, not getting frustrated. He was able to control the horse 'with his mind' he said. The volunteers were a little stunned at the difference too. "He is so much more mature this year", "He looked like he was meditating on the horse", "one on one worked so well for him". It was such a great feeling to watch these lovely volunteers really SEE the child I get to deal with at home for the first time in 2+ years. I often wonder if people really understand when I explain what he was like when he was at school and the huge change since homeschooling and the great child I get to see at home everyday. I don't think they really GOT IT till today. When I mentioned that today's child is the one I have at home and why I know homeschooling is best for him I got nods of agreement and genuine smiles. When I said that one on one is truly what works best for him, they knew I was right. And you know what, I don't really look for validation, or need it, but gee it's nice to get. So today's rainy day turned out to be a bonus private lesson. One that Warrior Kid loved especially since it was different to normal (no saddle or stirrups) and he had no anxiety over the change either. Ironically, while the lesson ended and we were all discussing how great he'd done, the sun came out.
It's week 4 of the Aussie (NOT) Back to School Blog Hop - and topic of the week is "Our Learning Space". The Blog Hop is being hosted by Our Worldwide Classroom and Every Bed of Roses, thanks ladies! Our Learning Space .... is small. Yes I am lucky enough to have a dedicated space and we converted the small spare bedroom in our shoe box 3 bedroom home (yes doing the Maths isn't it lucky I have only one child?!) into a classroom 4 years ago. It started out clean, un-cluttered and looking spacious. Oh that didn't last long! Here is a "back then" photo:
I look at that now and think OMG where is all our stuff! Mind you, we had everything we needed at the time. Things were a lot simpler then and I didn't know of as many book sales sights as I do now! Bare in mind that living in such a small house, we have no storage and this room was once a baby room (throughout our IVF days), a Tupperware office (during my sales years), and THE only storage space we have. This room has two cupboards and set of drawers that store our stuff (behind where I was standing to take this photo), my Tupperware and those few baby things I will always keep. This room also stores my huge collection of scrapbooking stuff which sadly has sat unused for years. It also houses our collection of medieval gear used for the one or two festivals we attend. We have a lot of stuff. So only half of the room is technically usable for us as a classroom. Now fast forward 4 years. Add in my obsession with books, starting my own Scholastic book club account, 4 years worth of curriculum, 4 years worth of projects, new shelves to fit the extra books, limited wall space etc. It's squishy, I won't deny that. But it works for us till we win lotto.
This is my most used item of furniture. Each drawer has a different subject. Bought from Officeworks for less than $30 on sale. Top drawer has general stuff and HEU papers. 2nd - Spelling 3rd - Grammar 4th - Handwriting and Reading Comprehension 5th - Mathematics 6th - Science 7th - History 8th - Geography 9th - Art 10th - Printer & Art paper These drawers help me keep organised and it helps the males in the house know where things go when I ask for something from the Spelling drawer LOL.
In this photo is my Tupperware drawers, Ring Binders, my organiser white board and a bookcase (it's actually a DVD shelf unit) for the Literature Units I have planned for the next 4 years. The books here include 24 from the Classic Starts Series, 16 from the Shakespeare Stories collection for Children, Fair Dinkum Histories series by Jackie French, Classic novels like Arabian Nights and the Tale of Two Cities, Narnia Series, History Quest series and the Mike Venezia Inventors books as well as books ready for high school reading. These include The Diary of Anne Frank, Playing Beattie Bow, Catcher In the Rye, A Brave New World, The Barrumbi Kids, and some poetry books by Edgar Allan Poe and Banjo Patterson.
This little bookcase houses our collection of "Horrible" books (Histories, Science & Geography) on the top shelf and the bottom shelf is all reference books. From science, history, picture books, atlas', biographies etc. Up top is a file storage box that has printed work to go with the reference books. When I come across work on websites or free curriculum sites, I print it out and file it here so I can find it easily when I am ready to get to that topic. It also holds our much used Scrabble game and my son's new favourite - the dreaded recorder! As well as the recorder book I found for $1 (bargain!).
This is Warrior Kid's desk. On the back of the desk caddy there is a weekly timetable so he knows the rough plan of the week. On the far side in the shelves you can see one of his mini whiteboards. He has two. We use them everyday. He has a love of stationary like his mother so has a huge stash of pencils and erasers, and easily fills a lot of his shelves with it. We keep all his Maths counters and sand timers, protractors and paddlepop sticks etc in there too. His art boxes are there, project boxes, globe etc. On his desk is a laminated prompt chart. It has the alphabet, numbers, days of the week, months of the year, counting grid etc. He will need to check it to reassure himself that he has written something the right way etc.
My desk. I have the PC and printer on my desk. Sitting in this configuration means that I can set up online clips and work for Warrior Kid and swivel the screen and he can view it (without it being in his way), and means I can easily help him with his work. I am now a pro at being able to read fluently upside down and back to front. I can even do find-a-words like that LOL.
I have the same shelving set as Warrior Kid does, mine is filled with Scrapbooking gear and photo albums, as well as all the Carer folders and medical documentation needed for all his therapies, Dr's, hospital appointments, funding, Disability Services, centrelink etc. That section takes up a lot of room and unfortunately seems to be growing.
The bookcases inside the doorway are Warrior Kid's FUN books to read whenever. Stuff like the Harry Potter series, How to Train Your Dragon series, Geronimo Stilton, Zac Power, Star Wars Academy books, 13 Story Treehouse series, Beast Quest, Roald Dalh collection, Goosebumps, Deltora Quest, Pokemon etc. This month I did what I never wanted .... I expanded into the hallway! We now have a DVD shelf unit full of the DVD's that go with the Classic Novels we are reading and also with the curriculum we are learning. AND a few books that don't fit anywhere else LOL. I REALLY need a library! Now we aren't stuck in this little room everyday. We might do an hour or two at a time but reading is done out in the lounge room or on the bed. Larger projects are done on the kitchen table or outside.
Outside is an old photo - because Warrior Kid's Dad desperately needs to mow the lawn and it currently looks horrendous. I won't be too hard on him though as he's had a melanoma removed from his back twice in the last month and it's not healing well so he's not up to yard work yet. So this is a few years ago, there is more grass now, plants (in the tyres) are bigger etc. Sadly due to Warrior Kids blood disorder, he bleeds too much in summer to use this year round, it really only gets used in winter.
Lounge room = TV and DVD watching area, iPad playing (and charging LOL), reading. Bookcase full of DVD storage. Oversize armchair for reading and laptop use. Dining room table for bigger projects (and to store boxes of books yet to fit in the classroom as per this photo LOL). Hallway storage (board games etc). So there it is. My little, old house. No second TV/family/media/rumpus room, little bedrooms, little everything. One day I will get my big house with a big library and classroom and store room ..... till then, this is it, very full - and usually covered in dog hair. Why would it be covered in dog hair you ask? Well this giant white hairy student likes to shed on everything and take over everything as per this last pic (yes that's a two seater couch size ottoman he is covering LOL and yes, he is watching TV hehehe).
This is week 3 of the Aussie (NOT) Back to School Blog Hop! Topic this week is 'A Day in Out Life'. Thanks to Our Worldwide Classroom and Every Bed Of Roses for hosting :)
Ok here goes! * Note: Our day usually starts with a bad night the night prior .... so I am going to start there! Prior to 5am: 3 x wake ups dealing with a crying boy suffering with his cramping again. Meaning 3 long sessions of rubbing his legs till his cramps ease and he goes back to sleep. The sessions usually last about half an hour, sometimes much longer. I smell of strong peppermint foot rub so at least my sinus' are clear! 5 am: Man of the house is up to shower and go to work and I am woken by the alarm but refuse to get up. 6 am: Dog barks to go outside. We have no doggy door as they don't make them big enough for our giant dog aka mini horse LOL. So I am up, barely. Dogs go out and I am torn - do I make a cuppa and get started for the day or go back to bed. Bed, always choose bed ;) 7 am: Warrior kid wakes - he slept in!! If it's been a good night he will wake at 5am with Man of the house. So now I am up. Really I am. 7.15 am: Breakfast for Warrior Kid and his morning schedule starts. He needs an hour at least to 'vege' out and wake up and usually watches some cartoons. I contemplate going back to bed hehehe. The Air Conditioning gets turned on and reinstates the igloo status to the house, aaahhh bliss :) 8.30 am: I've showered and gotten myself sorted for the day, skipped breakfast as usual (it just makes me feel sick eeww), turned on the computer and am now checking emails/facebook etc. 9.30 am: Our 'School Day' officially starts and today is basic 'warm up' stuff first off with a Spelling Unit from his workbook. It's a 4 page unit and will take us at least 1.5 hours to complete if I let it go at Warrior Kids pace, so we do parts (the essential bits) and do some spelling hangman on the whiteboard.
11 am Breaktime and Warrior Kid has found a doco to watch on National Geographic Channel. It goes for an hour but looks great so we have an extra long break and watch it while I do some cleaning. Warrior Kid is NOT an outdoorsy kid, and health wise cannot be out in the heat this time of year so doesn't go outside to play much during the day. 12 noon Doco has finished and it's lunchtime. Warrior kid picks scrambled eggs for lunch so helps me make it. He never used to eat lunch at school as cannot stand food that isn't cooked and warm. Only exception being ham, cheese and carrot wraps that must be made fresh and are not soggy or cold from the fridge. So anyway back to lunch, it's yum and then I do a quick clean up. Downside of cooking lunch everyday is the mess and time. Upside - it's so much nicer than a soggy sandwich! 1 pm Back to 'school'. Some days I have plans for what I want to cover, other days I let Warrior Kid pick. It depends on his mood and I find if he picks (and is in a not so motivated mood) then he will actually do the work. So he picked Maths. We use a great workbook called Maths Plus from Oxford University Press. We did 8 pages of that then did some quiz work in a notebook based on times tables. He can sit and work out a sum, but can't remember times tables off the top of his head, so we are practising a lot this month to see if his memory improves. He had two 10 min breaks throughout - I forgot to add them in as I was sorting through books for an upcoming resource sale LOL.
3.30 pm Reading time (free choice) - wind down time. This is not reading as part of our literature units, but free reading where he can pick whatever he likes to read. I try and encourage at least half an hour. Usually on the couch or on his bed. Today's book of choice is the "39 Story Treehouse".
4.15 pm Warrior Kid's Dad get's home from work so it's father and son time. I clock off for a while. Usually sitting at the PC either reading or writing this blog. Or reading a book etc. The boys either play video games, play outside as it's cooler, read more together, watch boy TV (yeah all the stuff I hate LOL) then have showers etc. 6 pm (now - I've just finished typing this so the rest is the usual nightly schedule) I clock back on duty and it's time to find something for dinner ;) In winter I try and be more prepared and have the slow cooker on or have things for the oven etc, but in summer most meals I can make in half hour to an hour so I don't prep. I do however need a TV in the kitchen as I keep missing Neighbours (Aussie TV Soapie for the non Aussies). 7 pm Dinner (and Home & Away - another TV Soapie). 8.30 - 9 pm Warrior Kid's bedtime. 11 pm My eventual bedtime. I always plan on going to bed sooner but it never happens LOL
This is just one day - other days we are out at excursions (tomorrow is Shrove Tuesday so that means a Pancake Lunch outing!), one morning a week we have horse riding, two afternoons a week we have after school activities starting this term. Today was just what Warrior Kid calls a 'Home Day'. Some days we do a lot more, others a lot less. Some weeks we are doing a block of work for one subject or theme, other weeks it's whatever my boy feels up to doing. Some days due to my health issues, I am not up to doing lessons and sitting at our desk in the classroom so it's reading on the couch, lots of documentaries and lots of digital media learning on the iPad and laptop. But that's it, one day in our life. Not too exciting ;)
2015 for us = Grade 5. Our first year going it alone and being registered with HEU (The QLD state Home Education Unit for those not in QLD or Australia). I've been deciding what to use for Warrior Kid over the last 2 years when with Distance Education but they also had influence, monitoring and often final say if needed. So this has been great to have complete freedom.
Our style of homeschooling is a combination of many, so quite eclectic. I use traditional bookwork but have a bit of a Charlotte Mason approach as well. I use Secular materials where possible but I get my wonderful literature units from a lovely Christian Homeschooler. When it comes to subjects he loves we are very interest led. We do notebooking and lapbooking as well as use workbooks and textbooks. We use online learning and do unit studies. Each style I read about had elements I liked and things that would work for my child - and things that wouldn't.
We use workbooks in some areas to appeal to my son's need for planned layouts and to see how much work is expected of him. It reduces his anxiety to know where to write his answers, how much writing is expected (due to the amount of space given), how it's expected to be laid out, examples to copy from when his perfectionism kicks in and he can't get his letters to look the right way (in the case of the Handwriting book) etc. This style works well for things like Spelling and Grammar lessons as well as Mathematics. Too many workbooks however is an overload and he will refuse work altogether so it is definitely a balancing act!
A themed unit study approach to various subjects works well here also. We tend to do our work in blocks rather than multiple subjects a day/week. A block for us can be a week, a fortnight or a month. A theme can run the whole year. It really depends on his enthusiasm and grasp of the work being learnt. Each block of work will have a theme or topic. That can be an area of Maths like multiplication or for Science it can be an Inventor. Topics like Science and History blocks include English work adapted to suit the block. For example a Science Inventor unit will have a report to write, we will use spelling words that correlate to the work being learnt. So despite having workbooks for many things, they get used as part of themed unit blocks. This keeps my son focused and the more time spent on a topic the better he retains the information. He needs day after day repetition and proficient recall to be able to build on the topic. Multiple subjects a day or week simply cut his concentration, heighten his anxiety (he feels pressure to rush to fit things in), reduce his comprehension and confuse him. In the past we have done year long themes for History. Countries of the World in one year, Australian History in another. This year there will be two 6 month themes running. One for History and one for Geography.
Supports put in place to help with his learning disabilities include using scaffolding and partnership writing (see Brave Writer program, blog and podcasts) have been the secrets to our success so far. These involve supporting each step in the process of writing work, whether that be a word, sentence, note point, or a story or report. We use desk top whiteboards where I will write the answers he gives me so that he can then copy them down. He cannot give the answer and write it simultaneously. A longer piece of writing like a book report or story involves him dictating to me while I type in a word document. It is then printed in large text for him to edit and check spelling. I then correct as per his edits. It's printed again and he then copies it with handwriting on paper. It's a long process but due to a combination of learning disorders, his motor planning and executive functioning skills are much lower than a child of his age despite having a very high IQ and knowing the work/answer. I modify work to exclude a lot of drawing and art as this is a huge anxiety trigger. His reading is done in partnership with me. Not only does he struggle with comprehension when reading himself, but his attention span and interest needs to be held while he overcomes frustration. His comprehension from a verbal delivery is outstanding however. So reading a chapter of a book means we alternate paragraphs or pages and re-cap at the top of each next page. This keeps his interest, allows great comprehension and retention, while giving him the much needed practice to read. Huge anxiety over a science experiment meant that he feared the subject. So his work is structured around learning science theory and content and then watching either a DVD, documentary, science show (like Scope or Backyard Science) or you tube clip to cover the experiment and practical element. Taking him out of the equation when it came to an experiment allowed him to be more 'involved' as we can watch, pause, discuss, predict etc without the panic of a possible failure or danger. All these steps mean that work for us takes a lot longer than it would for other students without these limitations. Lots of breaks are factored in, lots of planing to allocate enough time but not push too much in a day, yet still get through everything in a year.
As part of our learning we also plan and go on an Educational Adventure trip each year. Just teacher and student aka mother and son. We've been out to Longreach on the Spirit of the Outback train in 2013. In 2014 it was a long road trip to Ballarat (Sovereign Hill) and back home to Brisbane learning about Australian History (Bushrangers and the Gold Rush in particular) and much more along the way. It always fits in with our studies that year and really gives my son a hands on grasp of the subject and cements the work we have done at home. We always find there are so many other things you learn about on each trip. In Ballarat we planned to pan for gold at Sovereign Hill and instead got snowed on and experienced that for the first time, learning all about environments and geography and climates while we were at it! We went to The Dish at Parkes and covered Science along the way. I have found the expense and exhaustion so worth it for that real life experience of 'doing' rather than reading. Having said that, I feel we need to cover the work via reading and school work first for him to connect what he is experiencing. This year, 2015 has a trip to Canberra on our wish list. To coincide with his Government Studies this year in particular.
We have weekly Horse Riding therapy at Riding for Disabled again this year. Something that not only gives confidence, therapy, exercise, riding skills and happiness, but that gives a continuity to his routine that he craves. Hoping to add other things like junior league bowling and self defence classes over the year as well.
Other exciting things booked in for the year include getting to see 'Wicked' at QPAC in March, going to the Abbey Medieval Festival again this year and things like Museum visits, excursions, social events and fun stuff of course!
Most grammar will have practical application in the Literature Units listed below.
Macmillan McGraw Hill English (online print worksheets).
English (Reading, Comprehension, Text Types)
Literature Units from Confessions of a Homeschooler based on Classic abridged novels from the Classic Starts series. We also have DVD's for the books to be able to do comparisons. The units will be done via notebooking rather than lapbooking (which we have used in the past).
Books planned for the year: Treasure Island, Robin Hood, Peter Pan, Tom Sawyer, The Three Musketeers, Gullivers Travels and The Wind in the Willows. We have plenty more in the series and the Literature Units and DVD's to go with them but I am being ambitious with 7 books for the year considering I have a child who is a struggling reader.
Warrior Kid has a huge aversion to art which has been something we've worked on over the years and this year we hope to be able to do a little - but it is something that I won't push on him, it will be a case of following his lead when it eventually happens.
Health - We are using the Australian Organic Schools website for their units on Organic gardening. So we are starting those units and combined with Jamie Oliver DVD's, learning about how to grow our food, cook our food etc.
Of course, once you get into a workbook, curriculum and subject area, you can find it's just not working for you. So you put it aside and find something else ;) If you got through this very long post congrats and thank you for reading!
I am taking part in the Aussie (Not) Back to School Blog Hop thanks to Our Worldwide Classroom. This week the theme is "Meet the Students".
I homeschool my one and only child, my son, the Warrior Kid. He is 9, soon to be 10, and studying Grade 5.
He has a long list of disorders and health problems, so life is a challenge for him but one I am determined to help him through. We have more therapy to do this year, more hospital visits and testing to be done but hopefully a better year than the last one. I don't like describing him with his list of disorders but for you to understand why we do things the way we do, our limitations and the celebration of seemingly small success, I will.
Warrior Kid has Aspergers, Anxiety Disorder, OCD, SPD, Dyspraxia/Developmental Coordination Disorder (DCD), Non Verbal Learning Disorder and Auditory Processing issues amongst others. Take a breath. These things impact his learning, ability and social functioning. Physically he has quite severe Joint Hypermobility Disorder causing joint damage, muscle problems and breathing difficulty. We use a wheelchair on the bad days and on the 'lots of walking' days. He also has a blood disorder that is being further investigated but restricts what he can and can't do especially in summer.
Despite all this, he is a very clever kid, funny, full of insight well beyond his years.
This year will be WK's 3rd year of horse riding back at Crowson Park RDA which he is looking forward to. We have tickets ready for upcoming shows at QPAC that we love going to. The 'plan' for our annual homeschool adventure trip is to go to Canberra to coincide with his Government studies. We got a great head start with the recent state election!
The rest of the class includes three fur babies who like to get in on the action. A 17 year old Mr Cat who is rather vocal and crabby. A 5.5 year old Miss Border Collie who has higher anxiety that Seth and I combined. And a 5 year old Mr Maremma Sheepdog who is a giant sook and close companion for us both.
So that's the class of 2015 for you. Small but a handful!
They say a journey starts with a single step. In reality I think our journey into homeschooling, or rather 'Expedition', started with an anxious stumble, a scream, a big breath and an instant headache! The first year is split between the JOY of no school, the huge wonderful changes in your child and yourself as well as the new experiences you both have ... and stress. Yep I admit it - I was stressed. At the start you try to attach yourself to the type of group that seems to suit how you envisage your homeschooling journey should be. You join Facebook groups and forums where everyone is lovely but are interested in what type of homeschooler you are and what category you fit into and what you should be doing. You mention your 'tribe' and you become boxed in by it. You get subconsciously judged for it and you can get very defensive of it. It's like the playgroup circles all over again but this time your child has a bigger say in who you connect with and why. I found it exhausting and my first year of homeschooling my son was stressful rather than just exciting. Granted it is a much different kind of stress to that of mainstream school and for a while you think you are stress free and relaxed, only to realise you just downsized the stress - but it was still there, bubbling under the surface. Instead of taking time finding my feet and working out what I liked and what my son liked, I was drowning in a sea full of new homeschooling terms and working out what lifeboat to swim to! Do you stay in your Distance Ed boat doing what you are told, or stick a leg in the Charlotte Mason boat and what about the unschooling boat on the other side? It was confusing. It was also full of pressure. Being one of the first in my group of friends to homeschool I was constantly asked for help, information, guidance and feedback. I was happy to help, I know I would have a loved a good friend to help me out when we started, but it was a little like being under scrutiny all the time. Don't get me wrong, I loved homeschooling and I still do. My son loved it (which let's face it is the main thing!). I was proud of what we both achieved and happy to show photos and report on what work we had done and awards he won. I celebrated all the joy we had. I just felt very much like I had people to please all the time and that brings a lot of stress to your life, even if you don't realise it at the time. We did a lot that first year. We were with a Distance Ed school which at the time ran workshops and events. We went on excursions and joined social groups and tried sports and languages and everything in between. The second year brought with it the expectation of being able to keep it all up and do more! I pushed play dates and not only was that hard for my ASD son, but for a mother who also struggled socially, despite me being loud and to seemingly have my shit together, I was never sure of myself. And while my son was so much happier than he was at school, there was something not right with this as well. So many people told us that we'd have to be extra vigilant to 'socialise' my son because he is an only child. But we experienced more than one Bully in our homeschool socialising and more than one parent who allowed it to happen. It all got a bit too much for us and my son shut down again, so did I. It's a community that while vast in distance, is very much a small country town, close knit, everyone knows everyone type of community. When you are treated badly by a few, you find you can't go to anything without being confronted by the 'few'. It was hard. I find with ASD, in my house anyway, we have what I call a two year cycle. Starts with problems, you change things, you work on them, things go great, you get too cocky and do too much and then it all turns sour. The problems (although different ones) are back and it's time to re evaluate. Well it was problem time again for us. We started two years prior with a suicidal child, changed to homeschooling, worked on it and things seemed to be going well, I obviously pushed too much socially and he crashed. I spent many nights that second year awake in tears. Mother guilt. The usual. The 'I failed' mantra kicks in. And you keep it all to yourself. I started our third year very differently. Not only had my confidence grown on the curriculum side of things over the previous 2 years and I was able to basically tell the Distance Ed teacher what I was going to do and didn't ask permission, I also ignored all those who pushed any kind of expectation on us. I had quit nearly every homeschool group and forum I had belonged to and even some I helped run through our 2nd year. I had left social groups. I no longer pushed socialising onto my son. We had a sheltered year and while many will criticise me for it, it was the best thing I could have done. My son did the one social/sporting activity he liked - once per week, for 1 hour, that was it. We were still very busy with therapy appointments every day for declining health issues my son has. We were still with Distance Ed, but I stopped most interactions with them as it wasn't what my son wanted nor fitted in with the hospital and therapy. I made decisions for us. I took my time. I spent 6 months writing my application for HEU. I let my son finish the year with Distance Ed because for him and his OCD, that's what was needed. I didn't rush. We made it. January 2015 I posted off our HEU application and started on my terms this time. I picked my own combination of curriculum and I think I have probably got a bit from about 10 types of homeschooling I've come across. So what do I tell people if they ask me what kind of homeschooler I am? A bloody good one, that's what kind! Aren't we all? I have hopes, goals, plans (well planners at least, dozens of them, I'm OCD, of course I have planners LOL) and I have fears, doubts and hurdles (ok not hurdles, this fat lady doesn't jump hurdles, stumbling blocks may be a better analogy). I feel like we've been on a huge journey already. A guided tour using Distance Ed, social media and peer pressure. Now it's time to ditch the tour bus and go off road on our own self guided Expedition! ** Ok Ok 'off road' may not be a great analogy either ... I don't like to rough it/4x4/camp, so ahhhh lets say our own self guided, self booked hotel, Expedition. Just to be completely honest LOL. I'm no Princess, I'm a battle worn Warrior Mum - but end of the day I still prefer a castle to a tent! And so does my Warrior Kid xoxo
