Friday, 13 March 2015

This was NOT the plan!

No this was definitely NOT the plan! I have a son. His father and I always agreed that when it came time for the puberty talk especially regarding all the 'boy stuff' that it was going to be his father talking to him, not me. After all, had I had a daughter I would be the one telling her about all the 'girl stuff' as I know my partner would NOT be up for that conversation. However being that he is a man, he's been through it, we agreed he would do the boy talk.

So far we've had the general birds and bees talk, we've discussed where babies come from and been very factual (like you can be anything else when talking with someone with Aspergers). We've read "Where did I come from?", we've watched TV shows like 'My Great Big Adventure' that had an episode on puberty. The topic has been raised and been talked about in general.  But the BOY talk ..... well that was planned for soon, just not today, with me being the only parent at home. 

I bought books that were delivered today. A general stash with some science, history etc but the seller also had books called "What's Happening to Me" and "Sex Ed". I bought them to be ready. I bought them for my son's father to read to him. Soon.

That did NOT go to plan

You see I left the book pack on my desk and went to have a shower.  When I got out of the shower, guess who had gone through the stash.  It's close to his 10th birthday and I think he was snooping for possible presents (can't blame a kid for that when I do it myself LOL) and I've never told him that books were off limits so he isn't in trouble for looking. Kicking myself that I didn't put them up on a high shelf or something though!  

Now I will say this, it was fine reading and talking through these books with my son. I mean if I was a single mother I'd be doing it. I have no problem telling my son what he needs to know, but that wasn't the plan LOL. I am not going to lie, I think we were both a tad embarrassed. 

Despite my generation being told a lot more than generations before us, I personally was never given 'THE TALK', no not ever, by either parent, so I had no personal experience to go off with how to do THE TALK. My parents never told my sister either, I had to. That was just one kid telling another basics that I'd worked out myself. Certainly no experience with a boy talk. But I think having a boy with Aspergers helped as he likes facts and facts kept the embarrassment factor at bay a little. Over all I think it went fine, the odd funny comment here and there from Warrior Kid and the combined look of shock and horror and a little awe (LOL) at the pictures, especially of the naked girls when discussing the girl sections of the books, but we survived, and I can add this milestone to my long list of "Mum duties done well!"

I do feel a little ripped off though. I mean when it comes to everything else regarding my son, I do it. I teach him every day, I do the medical appointments, I do the therapy, I do the night time dramas, I deal with his pain issues, I clean up the nose bleeds, I plan the birthdays, I make the cakes, I do the shopping, I wrap the presents, I notice when he is outgrowing clothes, I do the hair cuts, I cut the finger nails - I do it all. I thought FINALLY there was ONE thing that I didn't have to do. One responsible parent thing that I could dodge. But Damn! 

So I survived, he survived and his father will get home tonight none the wiser and I'd say rather relieved when he hears the news. But he is not getting off that easy. He is going to be sitting down and giving the Dad version of what I covered today. Not because I think my son missed any info from me, but because I need to share this, I'm caring like that *insert sarcasm here!*. No really, he needs to have his turn at the BOY talk. Just so I can watch him squirm LOL. He will be fine, I have books for him. Even one that Warrior Kid didn't find! It's also a 'Whats Happening to Me?' but the boys book by Usborne Press

So have fun Dad, I broke the ice for you ;)  It should be easy for him right?


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